The Five Opening Strategies Every Speech Should Consider

If you've ever watched someone walk up to a microphone and open with "for those of you who don't know me, my name is —" you already know how much a weak opening costs. You're not listening to the speech at that point. You're bracing for it.

When we generate drafts, we deliberately rotate through five different opening strategies across them. You get to see which one feels most like you, rather than getting five rewrites of the same opening. Here's what each looks like, and when to use it.

1. The lighthearted hook

I've known Danny for 22 years. Long enough to remember the haircut. Long enough to remember that one summer he told everyone at camp he was Canadian because he thought it was more interesting.

Opens with a small, true, specific moment that makes the room laugh without costing anyone their dignity. Works for weddings, birthdays, retirements, and most toasts. Avoid for eulogies unless you knew the person loved being laughed at.

2. The heartfelt memory

The first time I met Sarah, I was seven and she was five, and I decided — apparently on the spot — that she was going to be my best friend for the rest of my life. I haven't changed my mind since.

Opens on emotional ground floor. Doesn't need to be funny because it's not trying to be. Great for maid of honor, parent-of-the-bride, and anniversary toasts. Dangerous for best man speeches unless you mean it — it can curdle into schmaltz quickly.

3. The surprising statement

I was not, technically, supposed to be here today. In 2019, Jamie fired me.

Opens with something the room wasn't expecting — a small contradiction, a backwards fact, or a confession. Earns attention in one sentence. Especially good for retirement and award-acceptance speeches, where the audience assumes they know the story arc.

4. The direct address

Mom. I wrote this twelve times. None of them were good enough. So I'm just going to talk to you.

Skips the framing and speaks straight to the honoree. Reads as intimate and sincere. Works for any speech where the honoree is present — weddings, birthdays, retirement. Don't fake the vulnerability, though: the audience can smell it.

5. The reflective frame

There's a Japanese word — kintsugi — for the practice of repairing broken pottery with gold. The cracks aren't hidden. They become the most beautiful part. I've thought about that word a lot this week, reading through what I wanted to say about my grandmother.

Opens with an idea, an image, or a quotation, then lands it on the person. Works beautifully for keynotes, eulogies, and graduation speeches. Risky for wedding toasts because it can feel self-consciously literary — pick it only if you'd actually say the word "kintsugi" in a sentence.

How to pick

Most people can skim the drafts and immediately know which opener is theirs. That's the point. If you're agonizing, the rule of thumb is: match the opener to what the audience would expect from you. A best man who's normally the quiet friend can open reflective and surprise the room. A best man who's the group's designated storyteller should open with the story.